Happiness

Happiness Revisited

We read an article that seems to be the introduction to a book about the study of the flow theory and how it relates to happiness.

When do you feel most happy?

There are a few times when I feel most happy. When I am rowing, on the water, on a still sunny, warm day, working hard; feeling the pain of each stroke. When the pain is good because we are moving fast. Because we are moving together, as a boat we are one. We all pull together. We all hurt together. We all feel the thrill of the wind, the pain from the lungs. We hear the clink-splash-splash - clink of rolling up together, finishing together. The next best time, I guess was during winter training. The moments during a hard piece on an erg and it's just me and the monitor. Every bit harder I pull, I see the numbers go down. When the exhilaration of the numbers overshadows the pain of reaching them. Even when the pain becomes too much, seeing if I can keep the number longer, just a little longer. When there is no world outside of the erg and myself. That's happiness even during the worst pain I have ever felt. Running, with the sun beating down on my neck, when the only sound is the patter of my feet on the road, feeling the first urges to drink water, overcoming the desire to just stop. That's happiness too. I guess I have a fair amount of happiness in my life.

Response to the Article

I feel that whoever wrote this article hit the nail on the head. The explanation of happiness, really happiness, not being content, or joyful, or excited, but that real happiness is why we live our lives, and is the easiest thing to lose. I also feel that her point on internal involvement is important. That what is happiness for one can be true hell for another. That you need to search for happiness, and work for it consciously not just follow what others do to become happy. Also, I agree that certain sensations that occurred while happy, when you next feel them you become happy again. There are still songs from winter training that just make me happy every time I hear them.

Where am I on the flow chart?

Well it really depends on time of day. Right now I would say that I am near the flow channel on the edge of boredom, but that is really by choice. This is the end of my finals week, still have AP tests left, but I just finished my last final exam. So this past week I have been in the anxiety side of the chart. However now that I realize that what I do will not change my test grades, I am relaxing, which for me always starts off hitting the boredom for about a day before self-challenging(like this weekend I plan on starting to learn CSS)

How has my position changed throughout my project?

Well at first I was pretty near the flow channel, maybe on the boredom side, but then I got injured, so disregarding classes, I would have put myself really low on the challenge axis, yet my skill hadn't changed much. However as I recovered I could challenge myself more and more, and my skill was increasing, so I am just at the edge of the flow channel on the boredom side, because I still have to be careful how long I run.

How can you achieve flow

Well, as a youth, I find that it is often hard to add challenges into the daily routine. So if you are on the boredom side, I would suggest, obviously you can't lose skill, but try something new. Drive a stick shift, or a motorcycle, use the mouse with your left hand, little things can keep the mind aware that nothing is for granted, and you are adding new skills(like how to use the computer if you lost a hand). If you find yourself on the Anxiety side of the chart, I have found, that while you cannot decrease the challenges, you can decrease your need to be skilled at them. My example of this is I have been really stressed out about my AP classes, so I went up to Cornell(where I'm going to college next year) and sat in on some classes. Doing this I realized that my desire to do perfectly in Calc and ComSci is completely out of place, as I cannot really place out of the introductory classes next year. So I lowered my commitment, and I guess my challenge levels, in those classes. This brought me out of the Anxious zone, and into the Flow channel.

New Shoes

I got new shoes

They are New Balance running 1420

 

Why did I get them?

Mainly, my physical therapist, Joe, at Finger Lakes Physical Therapy suggested a more minimalist design for running. He really though just wants me to have two pairs of running shoes, so I can do longer distances more times per week. He feels that each shoe will use different control muscles, so I should use different shoes with each run.

Research

I did not just go out and buy these shoes, I did a fair amount of research, specifically on brands, and found that many runners feel that New Balance shoes hold up well to long distance running, as well as providing lasting support, found here.

What am I doing now?

I still have cross training daily, crew every day 6-8am. Then now, during 8th period I have been going for a 30-40 minute run Tuesday and Friday, and a longer run on Saturday or Sunday, roughly an hour. This would be and needs to be longer, but Joe feels that I should keep the building slow to avoid injury.

Future Plans

Over the next few weeks I will need to be increasing my mileage, especially on the weekend runs. I also will be continuing physical therapy, and working on intensifying my stretching before and after runs.

A Tired Week

Spring break

This week is supposed to be a break right?

With daily double crew practices, and tons of homework this week has been very tiring for me. However I have had some free time(just no energy to enjoy it)so I have been learning some html over at codecademy . So I am blogging this completely through the HTML input. But that is neither here nor there. Back to crew practice; we have been practicing out of Cornell, due to inclement weather conditions, thus I spent 5 hours a day at their boathouse(left).

We have been training for 1500m pieces, which take about 5 minutes. Right is a picture of the course.

So we have been training for short distances, it means that my continued commitment to distance is becoming harder.

This week's runs

On monday after crew (when I still had energy) I went for a 3 mile run after crew, from the Cornell Boathouse to CBC and back. Then on Friday we ran from CBC to Cornell twice, so another 3 mile run. Both felt fine, no flare-ups from my injury, but the control muscles behind my calves were worn out at the end of each.

Physical Therapy

I went in on Tuesday and Thursday, to see "Joe". He had me working on agility as it is still a weakness of mine, and it wears out the part of my foot he suspects to be the cause of my injury.

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PT and run

Its been way too long since I have written. But that doesn't mean I haven't been working. Today I had physical therapy, besides some stretching, we have been working on building control muscles. The most stressing workout we did was sidestepping, on the balls of my feet, with Joe(the trainer) randomly telling me to sprint off. Joe noticed why my right foot got injured over my left foot, even when it means breaking stride, I launch with my right foot even when I try to think of launching with my left foot my right foot comes down. He said this is not too uncommon, it just means that my right foot comes under more stress when turning sharply or starting.
I then was out rowing for a total of 4 hours, and when I got home, even though I was really tired, I ran for about a mile and a half. On top of the fact that I only got 5 hours of sleep last night, I am completely fatigued.

In class NPR

Exiting my comfort zone... Well I love to leave my comfort zone, to the point where I feel my comfort zone is a very blurry zone. This is really cool because it allows me to grow in many different ways, and try many new things, challenge myself in a platitude of ways. A really problematic repercussion with this, though is that sometimes you, well I need a comfort zone. Like after I take a really bad calc test I need comforting, and with my zone in the way that it is, I have a really hard time retreating into my comfort zone.

On topic, I guess, this project has in fact taken me out of my comfort one as I knew it would, but in a very different way than I was expecting. I was expecting to be challenging used physically and mentally, learning new ways to cope with the pain of exhaustion. Instead I find myself dealing with the pain d being told not to do something, of meeting new doctors and learning how to speak ther language. Of self discovery, specifically discovering my limits an What happens when I overstep my limits.